An Obsessed Weblogger's Christmas To-Do List

Give your weblog reader literary joys to last them through the holiday season:

  1. New layout, hastily done, with holiday images stolen from other websites. (Generally done as reminiscence by webloggers who wouldn't know a non-dysfunctional family Christmas if it bit them.)
  2. Comet Cursors. (The reading experience of your weblog is enhanced by those swirling little snowflakes.)
  3. Blatant requests for gifts. ("How'd that link to my Amazon wishlist end up there?")
  4. Posting of "original holiday-themed work." (Think of it like poetry bingo - score points every time the amateur poet uses any of the following words: yule, sleigh, bells, reindeer, Santa, St. Nick, chimney, love, snow, home, carol, presents, children)
  5. Wear only Santa hat in front of webcam. Hope someone notices. Point them to #3 in exchange.
  6. Jingle Bells MIDI autoplay. (No more needs to be said.)
  7. Link to the NORAD-tracking-Santa homepage.
  8. [Cute | Terrifying | Terrifying] photos of [children | dogs | cats] [destroying | destroying | ignoring] new presents.
  9. Yearly re-posting of Grandma's egg nog recipe (double credit if it consists of "Go down to the store and buy a half-gallon of n brand eggnog", triple if the recipe includes pure grain alcohol)
  10. The same damn Christmas letter you send to your family. (Your readers can go through your archives if they're behind. Nobody needs a recap.)

In the spirit of generosity, an extra-special-awful #11 for those of you who have had the misfortune to encounter it: mp3s of the weblogger reading (or worse yet, singing) their favorite Christmas bits aloud. Until you encounter this for yourself, you cannot understand the sheer awfulness. May you never be forced to learn.

© 2002, with shiny happy contributions from CJL and Danno "Ghost Writer" Jensen. Please link back to this page if you post this on your site.


Oooh! I want to do #11 on my site now! Thanks for the idea! :)

Hey, some of us could do the singing bit and have it sound good! ;) Geof (has almost posted his Wish List a couple of times, but just so his folks would see it)

*grumble...* =)

Well, let's see. I have done #1 (new holiday layout), #3 (my amazon wishlist is left linked all year),, and am horribly likely to do #8 due to purchase of digital camera. #11 is tempting since I won't do mailed Christmas cards this year (because I suck). So hopefully no one was offended... :)

I've actually encountered #11 already. ::winces:: No, the twelve pains of christmas is not meant to be sung over a bad mic and then posted online.

I had to link to it. It's true and funny as heck!